With me..For a while !

Love,Hate,Color,RED ! I believe that happiness has something to do with the external world.When I see people crying in their sub-consciousness, under the effect of miracle drugs, I see them being in the emotion they actually feel.Probably, an inference can be drawn that if one can be him/her self then he has the least emotions to bother about.
The tremendous energy flows from me when I lose my "me" & feel the existence. It has been happening often during last few months.

Do I see you there ?
I don't know..

I am still struggling to simplify the things.The presence of Carbon in every material around is still unbelievable event for me ! The complexities are good, they drive me towards the simple life.

Does anyone knows about the thought which has not come yet ? Did I think about it when I was kid ?

The pragmatism & materialism are the strongest pillars for our existence.If they were not there then we would not have been the way we are !!

Justify..

The street of ignorance,
Which I entered when I was born,
Seems endless as there is nothing to bow..

The highly acclaimed thought of proving the truth,
Absconded at the same moment,
Because it faked the identity of the absolute truth,
Combustion of the desires,
Driving me to the state of sighs..

They never exist,
But they find me a pessimist,
Would you ever justify that
Is not it worth to wait for the sunrise when the night is shining bright ?

Emotional Burst-Out..

The long lasting seconds of my end,
And the driving force of my life,
Clashing their swords in front of my eyes,
Flying in my blue dream,
I searched for you around,
Stealing the sight from my passion,
I tried to abide by the rules of emotions..

Reaching your hand in a split second,
& I closed my eyes to kiss the beauty of the next moment,
Opened my eyes on a hissing sound,
A rattlesnake with fear was just starring at my tear..

The image of your RED on my retina,
Filling my heart with joy !
But I am afraid now,
To tell you the same,
Because I don't want you to address my words as "EMOTIONAL BURST OUTS" !!!

All moments of past & the ones coming as my future, will respect the blank that can only be filled by your presence..

A bit of me ?

All that dreams bring,
All those feelings that come - wearing a false identity of emotions,
All those things which do not exist in the real world,
They stay with me now,
In my broken thought..

Long nights,
When memory gets blind,
I feel a light,
Coming straight from your eyes..

Wondering wondering in those dark surroundings,
Feeling the flight - so high that it takes me to you,
In a second's time..

The questions & the answers are over now,
Just the silence of yours,
Disturbs me the most..!!!!!

Emotional Dependence is one of the very bad emotions to have, but I think, its better than having me..

The Killer..

Its all quiet around,
A killer comes to the main road,
He is walking carefully,
As his - weapon is deadly..

He is on his way to the mission he sees next,
Prepared with all arms,
Left pocket loaded with cakes,
Right one with the chocolates,

Polite he looks,
Honestly he behaves,
Smartly he stares,
& offers a chocolate..

The victim eats the chocolate,
Enjoys the treat - for the last time,
Before he dies..

The killer smiles - cunningly,
The victim feels a thurst,
Something had happened - he doesn't get what !!
He ate a radioactive substance - covered with the sweet chocolate..

In a week, his hands were numb,
In a month, his lungs were dumb,
Next few day, he was busy connecting his lever, kidney & nerves,
For the last few days,
He felt only the smile - of THE KILLER...

In Bloom..

Its drizzling -
The dowse is useless now,
Because it was not sooo dreary..

The leaves of trees remind me how green looks,
The roads as a long black Cobra,
Silence was steamy,
RED flowers in bloom,
Beauty of the nature's dance,
Knocking to enlighten my soul..

The soul that was reluctant to live,
Wishes to live - in this beautiful world,
For a heart to respond,
To the sunshine of my glorious love..

Shapeless..

They 're talking,
I just see them,
I can't hear what they 're saying,
Ears refusing it all obstinately,
Sense going shapeless..

My eyes are losing sight,
Or is it just lack of light ?
I don't see you around,
Are you there ?
My senses going shapeless..

Why am I feeling that my liver breathes ?
I believed its something that lungs did,
A stoical heart with marks of cigarrete smoke,
Pumping a putrid feeling,
My senses going shapeless..

Every micron in the brain,
Smells with a different type of anti-depressing firm,
Making my sleeps numb,
My senses ?
Ahh..there is nothing left..

Every minute I survive,
She Keeps her fingures crossed,
For me to die -
For that stubborn to win..

Absolutely Devilish..

I have been a dead to you,
I don't stand even nearby you,
Protect me from violet rays,
Deadly thoughts when they enter you !
Some of them want to refuse,
Some of them want to get refused,
You speak the truth which I don't understand,
I don't blame you..

Screem of darkness,
In the ephermal sunshine,
Don't be afraid,
I am not following you,
You speak the truth which I don't understand,
I don't blame you..

I got deceived by the skin you wear,
But its all you have got now,
Shoot me at sight,
Because you die if I survive,
You speak the truth which I don't understand,
I don't blame you..

Hate me, Kill me,
Because you have been so beautiful friend to me..

Lullaby..

As the sun departs,
& moon throws the beams upon the earth,
I sleep with the disappointment of wasting another day,
Throwing the disarmed body in the bed of flowers,
I remember the best moments to smile,
Sigh ! I have short term memory for the good that happens to me..

I waste - invest my hours to plan for the moment yet to come,
Avoiding the charm of THIS moment,
That appears like you - RED,
There but not there when I try to look at you..

Abusing you by all means,
Oh life ! how could you be strong still ?
My literate thoughts,
carving by deprived past even before I go to them,
But in some few moments -
I see my life,
Smiling - Blessing me..

Stranger Across the street..

On an enchanted morning,
I saw a stranger across the street of human souls,
She had almost crossed the line,
With the baby pig she had..

Peculiar smile on her face fascinated me,
Felt like first smile you had thrown at me,
Thrown up by tide of memory swing,
I realised that I was walking towards that wing..

She looked back,
I was just few human bodies away,
I saw her shoddy coat,
But I failed to feel..

Distance was diluted,
When I asked her how she had been,
The smile vanished at the lightening pace,
& I asked , "May I have this pig ?"

Sunrise..

Flying particles & water vapor together,
Scattered the blue light,
Left us a red sunset for sight,
Me with my dream - were flying in a flight..

For roar of engine
& cry of the pilot that I heard,
My mind preferred unconsciousness..

When I opened my eyes,
It was sight that I had never seen,
It was the sight that I should not have seen,
Lost in the sanctuary of thoughts,
First time - I was afraid of thoughts..

Just don't cry in the middle of the jungle,
Hope is the only thing you have got -
Keep searching the way out of the middle of the jungle..
My mother taught me once..

I waited - watched them,
All at once,
As I didn't react,
Dissapointedly they act..

And as I saw a tubular tongue of sunbird,
I started looking for the sun,
It was light - pure - yellow - devine,
The particles had settled,
It was a sunrise..

That filled me with its eternal sunshine..

Library..

Boredom lead me back to my interests,
Library & books & bunch of magazines - all over again,
Surfing on the ocean of information -
I stopped there once again -
The same shelf - the same book - which had taken my breath away..

I waited there - to have the same feeling all over again,
But to my surprise - it was not the same breath today,
And I missed to sustain..

I looked at those novels -
They didn't interest me -
As to read a them, remembrance of past was expected to understand the pecularities of future ,
And I didn't want to be suspected - For the crime I could not attempt - of remembering my past,
So, I left the shelf..

I looked at those magazines,
Flashy cover pages with movie artists,
I stopped there - looking at my childhood idols,
Then the belief that Actors are the most influencing humans,
No human should reserve the right to rule on someone's heart, came to my mind..
I walked by..

I looked at the books of Chemicals,
They looked sweet as a bomb yet to blast,
I took one of them,
As it might be my last..

At last, I stopped at the shelf,
Books of poetry,
I searched for my name,
I picked the one in the last row,
With the hope that it might lead me to the door,
Where I was lost years ago..
Allow me to discover myself - just once more..

I wish..

I wish -
To be a child,
Before I grow up as wild..

I wish -
To dance,
With the nature's rhyme - at the rain time..

I wish -
To make you smile,
Because thats how you look good in my eyes..

I wish -
To have all strain - that can make me insane,
So that I can understand LIFE very well..

I wish -
To paint your dress with RED,
Because thats how you look real jewel..

I wish -
To paint a picture of you,
With the colors I would not have found out without you..

I wish -
Land & Ocean be my best friends,
With whom I can roam anywhere..

I wish -
To let my life play its part,
Prolonging every emotion with art..

I wish -
To die just once,
Not everyday as it is done..

Senseless..

Its dreamy,
I am alive but not in my body,
I don't die,
Experiencing colours of a strong magnetic field,
Leaving this perilous world aside,
Wanting - wishing the longest flight,
Mournful faces full of wisdom,
& Poisonous hearts with sainted sanity,
Wondering hopelessly in my sight..

Seeing those clear eyes,
With no quesions to be answered,
& no emotional gears spreading tears,
Watching a blue sunset,
From a distance apart..

Its dreamy,
But I am getting back into my senses,
& now somebody please tell me,
Who drank my whisky ?
Did you ?
Did I ?

Dynamite..

Watching the sound as in a simple harmonic motion,
Just like it happens when the fire kisses the dynamite,
Figuring out the answer hidden in the question - equation,
The frequency coming out of the costly speakers,
Pushing me to the cheapest emotions,
Buying me pseudo identity..

Singing eyes & dancing eye-balls,
Proportional to the strength of rest of the senses,
Moving on the colors,
Coming straight from prismatic emotions,
Burning desires of the wealthy heart..

Destruct it all,
For the sake of living,
The dynamite of desires,
Because when filled,
It looks like they are empty still..

On music & Death..

The progression of drum beats evokes emptyness,
Sal sounds more punk than salary,
& screams sound like a rocket escaping the gravitational pull of the planet..

When everything is left,
You & the thoughts incorporating the hollow surroundings,
What is left ?
Spirit with flame of eternal music,
Dancing in the universe that shines..

At midnight,
World sounds sooo beautiful,
Looks like they are fighting in their dreams - waiting for the sunrise,
I love destruction,
Seems like creation is about to begin..

Should I sleep ?
Gallows waiting for me - tomorrow,
It should bother me - I have not done many things yet,
Why does it bother me ?